She's so money she doesn't even know.

Listening To: Got Your Money by Ol' Dirty Bastard

So by now you're probably thinking, "Amber, how did such an incredibly smart and attractive girl such as yourself fall into this position?" The answer is a mix of poor decision making and some plain bad luck. I'll take you through most of those stories in upcoming posts (I'm really looking forward to the one about my credit card history. Can't wait!), but since my ten dollar budget starts today, we'll begin with the most pertinent pit-fall when it comes to my financial life:

I'm a good-time girl. Also, I have very poor impulse control. If I decided, for fun, to take you through some of my old bank statements, we would discover that I spend most of my money on going out and other little "pick-me-ups".

The biggest temptation that I have always faced when it comes to my spending habits is going out with friends. It's so hard for me to say no: My friends really do hold the top priority in my life, so not hanging out with them at every opportunity feels like I'm missing out on valuable time that I won't ever get back. Plus there's that little thing about still being young and single and wanting to make the most of it before I'm an old hag...

The problem with going out all the time is that I always seem to spend way more than I had intended. And while my friendships are among the biggest priorities in my life, that is quickly becoming compromised because, as a result of my poor spending habits, more and more I'm having to deny myself time with them. When you don't even have the luxury of ordering your own priorities due to your poor decision making? That's when it's time for some self-ass-kickin'.

As for little "pick-me-ups", I love Starbucks, Barnes & Noble, iTunes, and Victoria's Secret. Those places have gotten so much of my money that I could probably campaign for honorary share-holding seats. My poor impulse control goes something like this: "Maybe I shouldn't go to Starbucks today. I could spend that five bucks on something else, like gas, or paying down my student loans...but I feel like going to Starbucks today. Going to Starbucks makes me so happy...and isn't life really about being happy? Shouldn't I get to be happy?! Let's go to Starbucks!" I can pretty much rationalize every single purchase I ever make: "Books will make me a more intelligent person. You can't put a price on knowledge."..."Victoria's Secret is the one thing I do that's super girly. If I take that away from myself, I might as well just cut off my boobs and start using a strap-on, because there will be no femininity left to me."...I could go on and on. I've had a lifetime of practice when it comes to coming up with great excuses. My parents can vouch for this.

I don't want to eliminate these things completely out of my life: I want to be financially responsible, not totally lame. Also, I don't know if you caught onto this, but I'm pretty horrible at self-deprivation, and I know from past experience that a certain amount of it will completely sabotage all of my efforts. So I just have to find ways to replace that certain type of mindless spending with habits that are more responsible. For instance, I've decided that I'll hold off on the Starbucks fix unless I'm hanging out with my hetero-life-partner Katy: It's kind of our thing, I'll enjoy it more, and it will give me time to plan for it in my budget. I'm also putting a hold on the Victoria's Secret purchases until there's a reason for me to show off my purchases, if you know what I mean (it means that I'm not going to buy anymore until I start getting laid on a regular basis. Just in case you really didn't know what I meant). I suppose I could stop being lazy and actually go out and get a library card instead of racking up purchases at B&N, but I think I'll just read more blogs instead of books in my spare time and just hope that I don't get dumber for it.

Notice that I haven't said anything about a plan for rationing time out with friends and the money I spend doing that. I think I might need to think on that one a bit more yet.

Livin' the American Dream...on only ten bucks a day.

Listening To: The Moneymaker by Rilo Kiley

"Living on ten bucks a day shouldn't be impossible," I thought to myself, as I stared at my budget plan for the next two months. I had just spent the last three hours lying awake in bed, my mind flitting from one stress point to the next. All money stress points, of course. I had a huge medical bill that was soon due. Then my mind wandered to my car, which is in the process of dying a slow, excruciating death. Student loans are being called up, my savings are becoming almost non-existent, etc. etc. To put it succinctly, I’m one unforeseen emergency away from financial disaster.

“Something has to give,” I found myself thinking as I rolled over to the other side of the bed, trying in vain to ward off the worry. Then that little voice - it sounds kind of like Suze Orman - popped into my head. “Like what?! You’re gonna win the lottery? The credit bureaus will suddenly decide to cut you a break because you’re such a great gal?! This crap is never going to change unless you do something about it now...or else you’re going to be 35 and still living in someone else’s basement.”

And that, my friends, is how epiphanies are made.

So I threw the covers back, jumped out of bed, and revved up my laptop. Pulling up all of the financial documents that I usually pretend don't exist, I took a long, hard, practical assessment of my status. You know what G.I. Joe said about how knowing is half the battle? 'Tis true. I maybe would have preferred the discovery of a secret stash of ten G's in some bank account I had forgotten about over the cold truth that my financial status at present is just as bleak as I had suspected, but whatev...you can't come up with a solution unless you know the full scope of the problem.

I’m a psych girl, so I’m rather fond of experiments. I also don’t seem to learn anything unless I - to quote a friend - Keep It Extreme, so I’ve set myself on a budget of ten dollars a day for at least a month. Keepin’ It Extreme would usually dictate that I do it for six months, but that sounds more like crazy-talk than a viable plan. Most studies say that it takes around 21 days to form a habit. That's what this will be about: Reforming old bank-breaking habits into new ones that will lead to financial stability. Forcing myself to explore my relationship to money and what role that plays in terms of my priorities probably won't hurt, either. The psychologist in me is also curious as to whether living on ten greenbacks a day is even feasible. Half of the world lives on just $2 a day. Is it possible to provide for my basic needs on more than three times that? And if it isn't, what will that say about my definition of basic needs...and in the larger perspective, about the culture I live in?

We can talk more about our society's culture of consumption and psychology of materialism at a later date (for instance, when I'm feeling particularly deprived and am looking for something to bitch-slap out of blame). For now, let me take you through the ground rules I've set for myself:

1. The budget is for living expenses such as gas, food, toiletries, entertainment, etc. Bills like rent are not included.

2. It's a roll-over plan. For instance, if I do not spend ten dollars one day, the next day I will have twenty dollars to spend, and so on. However, if I go over my budget, I have to subtract from the next days’ balance to keep myself out of the hole and in the clear.

3. All expenses must be recorded and accounted for. For instance, cash and coin count. There will be no “Oh, I found five dollars in quarters on the sidewalk somewhere, so this venti Starbucks doesn’t count!!” (I have a very high awareness of how I operate when under duress or restrictions).

So why blog about it? It will keep me accountable. Also, it's no secret that my peer group in particular seems to have a significant problem with debt...we've even been coined "Generation Broke" by the media. It always makes me feel better to read about someone who's worse off than me, so maybe I can provide that feel-good vibe for someone else. Some might be interested in a little social and financial experiment such as trying to live on a meager amount every day. I'm not necessarily doing this to bring awareness to America's materialism or out-of-control consumption, however...I've heard of consumption movements and, while worthy, they just sound like a drag. The main motivation is to prove to myself that I can do it (I can do it!!), and to shape my relationship with money into one that is responsible, beneficial, and respectful to both myself and those I have financial relationships with.

Plus, blogs are great for bitching, and I'm sure that after about three days of not being able to afford my beloved white chocolate mochas from Starbucks, this girl is gonna wanna bitch.